If there are two things I love in life it’s killer fish and soft-core porn. Watching Piranha 3D, it became clear I had found a kindred spirit in director, Alexandre Aja.
Aja’s decision to dunk as many nipples in the fish tank as piranha tickled my fancies like a feather duster. More »
Whatever you think about Mars Bars, we can all agree they’re consistent. If you’ve eaten one, you’ve eaten a million. The same can be said about the Resident Evil franchise. While I’d enjoyed elements of the first three, overall I was more letdown than a vegetarian at an all-you-can-eat rib joint. More »
I had a cracking idea for a film recently. The plan went something like this: spread mayonnaise on the faces of a band of amateur actors and have them amble round in front of a camera for a few hours.
So it was that I watched Survival of the Dead only to find zombie maestro, George A Romero, had pipped me to the post. More »
There are no oily-chest, scantily clad fellows in Neil Marshall’s modern day Roman epic, Centurion. For fans of Gerard ‘look at my 57-pack’ Butler, this may prove a disappointment.
The British director, famed for tightly constructed, low-budget horror movies, tones down the glamour of films such as 300 and Gladiator More »
Let’s face it. We live in an age of remakes. Hollywood, fresh out of ideas, continues to mine the movie well for all it’s worth – yeah, I’m talking to you Michael Bay.
With the odd exception, these re-imaginings melt into nothingness faster than an ice-cube in a cup of coffee. More »